Oh Christ, not again!

1) Again with the fucking rug! Does he keep going back to this because it's the last smart decision he's made?

For whatever reason, Bush seems fixated on his rug. Virtually all visitors to the Oval Office find him regaling them about how it was chosen and what it represents. Turns out, he always says, the first decision any president makes is what carpet he wants in his office. As a take-charge leader, he then explains, he of course made a command decision -- he delegated the decision to Laura Bush, who chose a yellow sunbeam design.

And then there's this gem.

"If you walk in that Oval Office," Bush said in Sterling, "I think you're going to say, just like you know it, 'This guy's optimistic.' "

Sadly, no. If you walk into the Oval Office, your thoughts are more likely to turn to:

• "When I look into his eyes, I can see the back of his head"


• "OK, ANWR, prepare to be pillaged!"


or


• "Please tell me I don't look like a quail!"